Dark Knight Disappears While Investigating Bee Deaths

The legendary Guardian of Gotham, Batman, has disappeared suddenly while investigating the cause behind the collapse of honeybee colonies the world over.

The continuing deaths of millions of honeybees around the world has baffled scientists of all stripes. Some say it's due to pesticides. Others theorize it's due to genetically engineered crops, fungi, or even cellphone radiation. Whatever the case, with world authorities are at a loss, the only solution was to turn to the Dark Night Detective.

Already concerned that the bee deaths might be part of the Amazons' plot to conquer humanity through collapse of our ecosystem, Batman is rumored to have tracked the culprits behind the bee deaths to an Amazon island colony called Summerisle. In his last dispatch to the Justice League, Batman said:

"I'm investigating using the identity of a policeman looking for his daughter. Name is Edward Malus. Do not break radio silence unless I contact you. And make sure to keep bee sting remedies ready."

Since that last transmission, neither the Justice League nor the Gotham Police Department has heard anything from the legendary detective. Neither was available for comment.

However, the Bugle's Planet Daily has obtained footage purporting to be a videotaped record of Batman's exploits on the island in case he was harmed or killed. The tape is grainy and clearly edited, but appears to show Batman engaged in increasingly erratic behavior before apparently being sacrificed by the Amazons to ensure their victory.

We warn you that the following footage is extremely graphic, and may not be suitable for children:



Bugle's Planet Daily is currently investigating the veracity of this new information, and we will keep you posted with any breaking new developments.

Flash: World's Fastest Fraud?

KEYSTONE CITY - Local attorney Giuseppe James thinks famed superhero The Flash is pulling a hoax over everyone, pretending to capture criminals with powers he doesn't have.

"I've never seen him actually do anything. And if he wants to keep that museum our tax dollars pay for, he should prove he's actually doing something," James said in a press conference this afternoon. "We, the fair citizens of Keystone, owe it ourselves to get the truth."

James, a relative unknown in local politics, has caused quite a stir with his repeated assertions that The Flash is a fake. His tirades have gotten the notice of city council members, and The Flash, himself.

When asked to prove his powers, the Scarlet Speedster turned slightly, and then handed me a Gotham Gazette, the late afternoon edition which would have only been available twenty minutes before.

But Giuseppe James has heard of many of The Flash's feats, and doubts them all.

"How many times must we see guns 'mysteriously' vanish from people's hands and see this Flash 'produce' objects from thin air before we call these 'feats' what they are. Tricks. And not even elaborate ones, at that." Mr. James then seemingly caused the podium to float for a few seconds to some shock and much applause. "Now that's a trick The Flash couldn't pull off. He's a David Blaine, at best!"

Not everyone is swayed by James' speeches. Everyday Keystonians are almost unanimously on the side of their fleet-footed hero. Bobby Nesmith, an accountant and community advocate, has unwavering faith in The Flash. "He's saved this town and the worlds many times, and many times over. How anyone can doubt that is beyond me."

Rachel Grant, a bank manager for Keystone Providential, was saved by The Flash not three moths ago from a robbery gone awry by Mirror Master. "He just rushed in, and yeah he broke a few of the windows and dented the countertops, but if it wasn't for Flash, well, that green helmet freak made some offensive threats to me."

With The Flash spending much of his time dealing with catastrophes and criminals, who knows when Giuseppe's claims will be verified or dismissed. James remains resolute in his claims.

"If he's so fast, why is he so slow to respond?"