BPD EXPRESS: Sixth Edition

SUPER POWERED NEWS BITES

Harry Sampson The Real Homer?
After a twenty year battle Harry Sampson, the newly announced 'original face of Homer Simpson,' has finally been acknowledged by Simpsons creator Matt Groening. Of course, the payout of a $20 settlement will help too—possibly with tonight's dinner.

"They mocked my visage and my speech to create that dufus. I hope the loss of twenty bucks will teach them they can't do this to people."

After it was suggested he might have asked for twenty million dollars Sampson slapped himself on the forehead with a heartfelt "D'oh!"

Images by photographer Pixeloo see more of his work at pixeloo.blogspot.com

Batman Secret Identity Hoax
A recent media frenzy speculated a note (sprawled on a Gotham City mailbox) had revealed Batman's secret identity. That of billionaire Bruce Wayne. This week BPD has discovered a much less interesting though more insidious truth: America has punctuation issues.

Calvin Hogdutter just wanted to share a "goofy idea I'd gotten" with a friend who wasn't home at the time. "I just couldn't wait," said the cum laude grad, "so I wrote it on the mailbox. Who knew a comma changes the meaning of a sentence?!"

Hogdutter's missive should have read:
"Bruce, Wayne is Batman"

As in their mutual friend Wayne Peterson
of 1221 Lovecraft St, West Gotham.

Sadly, this information has also proven erroneous.

photo by Occasional Superheroine. See more of her work at occasionalsuperheroine.blogspot.com

J.Lo's Baby-Daddy the Skeleton in He-Man's Closet
Although many claim to have known it all along, we now have incontrovertible proof that singer Marc Anthony is in fact Skeletor.

"I just don't know why he ripped off his mask the way he did," said the fan who caught this candid shot of the couple. "I mean, we all suspected. It's right there in the bone structure. But, why'd he come out of the closet so suddenly!? I almost pissed my pants...by the way, has anyone seen that kid? I'm just sayin'..."

We Need Your HELP!
Spotted any other Masters of the Universe characters on the streets? Have they been makin' babies? Let us know. Upload a picture.

NEWS BITES COMPILED BY
Senior Editor SHERIN NICOLE