Atom Seeks Treatment for Microphobia

IVY TOWN - Rookie hero The Atom has sought treatment for a condition tentatively identified as "microphobia": the fear of tiny things. (This is not the same as "nanophobia," which is the fear of really tiny things, but is closely related.)

"I started having, well, hallucinations when I was changing size," admitted the distraught hero. "It just isn't normal to see the things I was seeing. Floating heads, colonies of aliens living on my dog, a microscopic serial killer... I mean, does this sort of thing happen to other heroes or is it only me?"

The Atom's fellow heroes noted that he has been under considerable stress for some time.

"He's had personal issues this past year--resolving some long-standing issues with his father and some past relationships," said Wonder Woman. "He just needs some time and space to sort things out. He has a warrior's heart and I'm confident he'll bounce back."

"My microscopic vision hasn't found the oddities the Atom describes, but that's his world--the microscopic world, I mean," said Superman. "Could be there are some dangers down there that we can't foresee. If the Atom has found cause to be alarmed, it would be better for the Justice League to have a plan in place." He grimaced and added, "I bet Batman already has plans for a microscopic invasion in that cave of his..."

The Atom's public statements did not address allegations of an attack by dust bunnies in a Motel6 this past week.

Dark Knight Disappears While Investigating Bee Deaths

The legendary Guardian of Gotham, Batman, has disappeared suddenly while investigating the cause behind the collapse of honeybee colonies the world over.

The continuing deaths of millions of honeybees around the world has baffled scientists of all stripes. Some say it's due to pesticides. Others theorize it's due to genetically engineered crops, fungi, or even cellphone radiation. Whatever the case, with world authorities are at a loss, the only solution was to turn to the Dark Night Detective.

Already concerned that the bee deaths might be part of the Amazons' plot to conquer humanity through collapse of our ecosystem, Batman is rumored to have tracked the culprits behind the bee deaths to an Amazon island colony called Summerisle. In his last dispatch to the Justice League, Batman said:

"I'm investigating using the identity of a policeman looking for his daughter. Name is Edward Malus. Do not break radio silence unless I contact you. And make sure to keep bee sting remedies ready."

Since that last transmission, neither the Justice League nor the Gotham Police Department has heard anything from the legendary detective. Neither was available for comment.

However, the Bugle's Planet Daily has obtained footage purporting to be a videotaped record of Batman's exploits on the island in case he was harmed or killed. The tape is grainy and clearly edited, but appears to show Batman engaged in increasingly erratic behavior before apparently being sacrificed by the Amazons to ensure their victory.

We warn you that the following footage is extremely graphic, and may not be suitable for children:



Bugle's Planet Daily is currently investigating the veracity of this new information, and we will keep you posted with any breaking new developments.

Crazy Person Claims Secret Identities "Not So Secret"

GOTHAM CITY - Today was a sad day for Maury Horowitz, who was committed to Arkham Asylum after decades of outrageous claims regarding the identities of certain superheroes. Horowitz, 60, claims to have an uncanny ability to discern the identities of caped and masked crusaders simply based upon their physical appearance. After prolonged sessions of therapy, medication, and even hypnosis with psychiatrist Harleen Quinzel, it was determined that Horowitz's delusions had caused him to become a danger to himself and others.

In a recent interview with reporter Jimmy Olsen, Horowitz claimed to know the identity of several heroes, including Superman and the Green Arrow. "They're the same guy!" he ranted. "Superman and that reporter guy married to Lois Lane. The only difference is the glasses! It's just a pair of glasses!" Olsen told the BPD that this was "pure hogwash" and that there is "no way" that Superman and Clark Kent are the same person. "They both happen to be close personal friends of mine," Olsen said. "I'd know if they were the same person."

On the subject of the Green Arrow, Horowitz's claims are equally outlandish. "Okay... liberal crusading mayor with blonde hair and goatee... liberal crusading superhero with blonde hair and goatee. Same city... same hair... same goatee. C'mon, people!" Arkham Asylum staff have placed Horowitz under heavy sedation in the hopes that one day his condition can be cured.

Justice League of America member Red Arrow spoke with BPD about the steps he takes to protect his identity. "Well, I wear this mask. It covers the area immediately around my eyes." When asked if he was concerned about a villain one day discovering his identity, he quickly replied, "Haven't you been reading our comic? We don't fight villains."