If the combined comic book universes had their equivalent of The Onion, this would be it. The BDP can be a bit hit and miss in its humor, but when it's on, it's on. The perfect tonic for those who take their funnybooks too seriously.
NEW YORK - Daily Bugle publisher J. Jonah Jameson put to press his 20,000th editorial condemning Spider-Man as a "threat or menace" to the Big Apple. This marks an unprecedented run for any journalistic crusade, particularly with a single individual as its target.
Called for a comment, Jameson said, "While I wouldn't normally speak to you inkslingers at the BP, I gotta say... this felt good. That sleazy wall-crawling menace has been skulking around NYC for too go--gosh darn long! He's up to no good and the Bugle won't stop until he's brought to justice. I thought I had him where I wanted him when I put his costume on my wall... but no! I bet he planned that whole thing to make me look ridiculous."
Bugle editor in chief Joseph "Robbie" Robertson added: "Jonah's a New York original. He's got strong opinions and will share them with anyone who plunks down 35 cents for the Bugle. I wouldn't have it any other way."
The Bugle has been in the forefront of coverage on recent "black suit Spider-Man" sightings, following the hero's public, acrimonious parting with the Pro-Registration contingent of heroes led by Iron Man. After publicly unmasking himself as photographer/science teacher Peter Parker, the hero has been on the run, breaking the law by refusing to register.
Rumors that Parker has nearly been brought down by agents of the superheroic Initiative remain unconfirmed at this time.
J.K. Simmons as "J. Jonah Jameson" in recent Spider-Man biopic; all rights copyright Sony